I don't know what to do anymore

I asked him this morning – about his lawyer appointment
He told me should be Friday and he said that it was to ask details, custody etc
Seriously? If it was so and if you wanted to be with me – I am sure you would have told me without my prob right?

I saw his wedding ring mark again this morning

Couldn’t control myself and told him that he didn’t have to remove it anymore
He gave me the same excuse that he wear it to his mum house cause she didn’t know? (erm.. did you forget that you told me you moved back home previously? Why would she not know then?)
I’m so sick of doubting him, doubting myself, asking myself what I am doing

She’s so smart by giving him the space so that she doesn’t ‘push’ him away and get to keep him with the family

She is right and afterall she deserves to be with him and the family
I just cant do it.. I’ll be left with nothing when he cuts me off
I cannot continue doing this anymore.. I’ve become so paranoid and insecure

I know I shouldn’t and cannot feel jealous and upset over their time together

I know I am just the intruder and have no right to feel this way
I really am feeling very down

I know I said I wanted to enjoy the rest of my time with him

But it’s so hard to live with such dishonesty and lies